Naturally

Why do people become gays or lesbians? I mean, people are naturally attracted to the opposite sex, so what influences some people to be attracted towards to their own sex?
–What’s Natural?

Well, there’s your problem in a nutshell. People are not “naturally” attracted to the opposite sex. There’s nothing natural, inherent, or inevitable about sexual attraction or gender identity. These things are fabulously variable and fluid. I’ll give you a great example: just last week I attended a conference in Kathmandu about strategies for defending queer rights in South Asia (organized by the Blue Diamond Society of Nepal and LLH Norway), and there I met a lovely transgender woman who spoke at the conference about identifying as a heterosexual. Now, here’s an individual who was born as a biological male, but identifies and lives her life as a straight woman. Is that “natural”?  Who cares? And there are so many more varieties: trans individuals who desire with same-sex desires, trans individuals who desire other trans people, same-sex desiring individuals, bisexuals, pan-sexuals, straight people who don’t want kids (procreation, of course, being the usual rock with which heterosexists bludgeon others with the “unnaturalness” of same-sex desire), you name it. Just going by the sheer variety of ways that people express sexual desire and experience pleasure, I don’t think it’s possible to talk about what’s natural. Some people are born with their desires hardwired into their brains and others are not. Asking the question of why some people become gay or lesbian does not make any more sense than asking why some people become straight. A better question would be, “how do we, as a society, protect and celebrate the diversity of sexual and gender identities in our communities?” That’s not the question you asked, of course, but it’s a much more productive and inclusive one.